Sarah, Carol and Cheyenne celebrating…

I received a giant birthday card the other day from Regan, the beautiful and delightfully spunky daughter of my dear friend Barbara.  In the card Regan said, "Mom says it doesn’t matter when I send this card because when you are fifty you celebrate every day."  I smile every time I look at that card.  I am reminded of the laughs Barbara, Regan and I recently had out In Emmitsburg (at the FEMA Hi Ed Conference).   Every time we encountered each other we were cracking up about something (and often the something was really a bunch of nothing that we found incredibly funny).  Barbara and Regan are the type of folks that see life with an eye on the humor of it all.  When you spend time in the company of those who have this view you can’t help but be lightened up yourself.

Most of my friends are of the Barbara and Regan mold – beacons of joy and light – not because their lives are so grand and absent the challenges that other folks have (heaven knows a number of my friends have faced major emotional and physical challenges that have been life-altering).  No, being a beacon of joy and light is more about choice than events.  It is a mindset that chooses laughter over tears.

My youngest daughter gave me a necklace this past Christmas that I absolutely love. It reads, "Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and your mascara runs."  With recognition that it is meant to be a cute saying that sells the necklace, I think there is a reason that it sells the necklace – it contains some truth. We want to focus on the happy not the sad.  We want to see the humor in life (well, I think most of us do – I have met a few folks in life not necessarily so inclined -and yes, I am talking to you ticket-giving guy at NDSU – and no I am not BITTER).  Granted horrible things can happen to people and not every happening in life has the option of humor…but many do if you choose it.  That is what Barbara and Regan and so many of the people close to me do – they choose laughter.

Now that puts a whole new spin on being pro-choice…choose laughter.  I am all for being able to use humor to get through the rises and falls within one’s life.  Lord knows laughter has carried me through many a challenging time (and many a challenging haircut, diet and outfit choice as well).  It helps that I am surrounded by wacky and wonderful people who likewise choose laughter.  I consider it one of my biggest blessings. Laughter is supposed to be great for your health and I laugh a lot. I guess I should thank my friends and family for getting me to the new forty as I surely arrived intact in part because of the healthy outcome of laughing my ass off (figuratively of course…hmmm…is that a pun?).

I saw a statistic awhile back that said that kids laugh over 300 times a day while adults only laugh 15 times a day. Wow – shocking the difference. I have to tell you though that I am not so sure about the study participants that represented the adults. I don’t think they are necessarily representive – particularly of me. I laugh a lot at all sorts of silly little things. Of course I have a handy talent of cracking myself up. This talent is underappreciated by my children (and I think my students as well, but they laugh I surmise because I am the one who ultimately assigns their grades), but I assure you it is of value. The ability to laugh at one’s self and at life generally is important in not taking one’s self or life too seriously.

Because let’s face it – life is serious business: bad things happen that shouldn’t and good people get injured or die; the planet and all the life on it operates in a precarious balance that we do not seem to fully appreciate yet as a species; violence and wars continue to define our disagreements over ideology, land and rights; and too many are suffering from woes that cannot be remediated by money. Yep- really serious stuff. I wonder if this serious stuff was what was going through the study participants’ minds when their laughter was measured; none of it is laughable.

Yet, even with the understanding that life is so very serious we gravitate toward the laughter and that is, as Martha would say "a good thing". Happiness is the ideal for human beings and we are moved closer to it by laughter. Whatsmore, laughter is infectious – viral even (now that is the kind of pandemic I can get behind).  When someone is laughing till they cry it is difficult not to laugh too.  Also, if you have ever lived the moment when something strikes you as funny and you have a good laugh, but then seem to be unable to stop laughing at anything that is said after that – suddenly everything is funny – you realize that glee is spiritually lightening – even when what you are laughing at is, in essence, nothing at all.

Laughter is such a beautiful thing.  I agree that every day should be a celebration from day one forward, but particularly when you get to fifty (which is my new, and so far- quite interesting, forty).  Having lived half a century and still having the opportunity to spend time with the people you love, do the work you love, and enjoy the beauty around you – well DUH – of course it is all good.  So even though my mascara may run from time to time, much more noticeable than that are the laugh lines I have acquired from choosing laughter as a mindset.  

So look around today and celebrate life with a good laugh…and by all means infect others with your laughter as well.  Try and out-do the 15 laughs a day count attributed to adults…and please do let me know how it turns out.  Let’s see if we can disprove this abysmal statistic with the joy of our reality.  

Day seven of the new forty – obla di obla da

CC